Saturday, August 21, 2010
heh i got feelings too right? just because of how i feel. how i act. how i behave. doesn't mean that you can just forget all about human feelings and rights. it's absurb how you behave and treat me. it buffers me your behavior towards me. how different it is. maybe its another one of your sides that you show only to special few? maybe it's just cause you see me as easy to bully? it really gets me thinking. especially after a bathe, how you treated me today.
natsu was, in simple terms, boring. how crowded it was. how badly co-organized it was. even though many friends actually got together, made it all worth while. i honestly distaste the last part. where if i was with shawn and company. i would have to participate. the last segment was dancing. i personally do not like to dance randomly. with literally no practice. to me it's one of the most hated things i would not ever want to do. the beer was great though. sitting there drinking beer watching them all have fun. it doesn't sound as horrible as it seems.
i don't know whether or not i will ever be able to love someone truely every again. but if caring for someone means loving someone. i can live without love and just care for someone. it scares me, sometimes how much love can affect someone. till there is actually no second choice no second chances.
if you really do love me. i hope you understand that i do have feelings too not someone u can hurl vulgarities at and hit. i am not a doll.
